Doubt
“Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” Mark 9:24
First of all, nothing is wrong with you. If you keep telling yourself that something is wrong with you, then that’s what you’re going to believe, and that’s what your reality is going to be. And the opposite is true as well. If you tell yourself nothing is wrong and that what you're feeling is only temporary, that is what you’ll believe, and that will be your reality.
Doubt is a test that God the Most High is allowing. And if He’s allowing it, that means He knows you can handle it. And if He knows you can handle it, then I believe that means you will succeed, but not on your own, but with Jesus Christ. So never let go of Him because He will never let go of you.
T.A.B.’s personal anecdote:
All of us who are believers go through doubt at some point in our journeys, myself included. Everyone’s journey is different, so there is no cookie-cutter way of handling and overcoming trials and tribulations. But just know it’s a process, change doesn’t usually happen overnight, depending on your heart posture, and you are never alone.
“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33.
One thing that I struggled with (and still struggle with now) is not to think of prayer as an obligation and not to turn prayer into a formula. If I do and say x, y, z at these exact times every day, then God will hear me and answer me. Wrong.
Prayer is not a performance.
Go back to the gospels, Jesus came to rebuke the Pharisees and try to correct their ways, but they were so corrupt in their mindset that they were unwilling to listen. “He who has ears to hear let him hear,” is said multiple times in the Bible.
In my journey, I’ve been in the pit for the majority of my life, and only recently (the past year and eight months) did I actually rediscover my faith and rejoin God in my walk. Here are some tips (not a formula lol!) that I’ve learned along the way:
In all things, no matter what you’re going through, thank God. (1 + 2**) This is a choice that you have to make daily. Think of everything that St. Paul went through, and he still thanked God for everything. (3**)
You cannot rely on your heart or your feelings to be “in the right mood” to pray because you can end up waiting a long time until you “feel” ready. (4**) That’s a trick and a lie from the enemy to delay your time with God and to keep you away from Him.
The longer the enemy can keep you away from God, the more he can pull you further away from God. And with that comes delayed blessings and promises and, in some cases, they can even be stolen from you if you’re not in the right place with God to receive them.
Whatever you’re feeling, go to your quiet place, (5**) go as you are, give praise to Him, repent for whatever you need to repent for, and cast all your troubles onto Him because He cares for you. (6**) He is waiting for you, always, and He will not reject you. (7**)
**Scripture to support:
“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” I Thessalonians 5:16-18
“Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, And into His courts with praise. Be thankful to Him, and bless His name.” Psalms 100:4
“From the Jews five times I received forty stripes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods; once I was stoned; three times I was shipwrecked; a night and a day I have been in the deep; in journeys often, in perils of waters, in perils of robbers, in perils of my own countrymen, in perils of the Gentiles, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; in weariness and toil, in sleeplessness often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness— besides the other things, what comes upon me daily: my deep concern for all the churches.” II Corinthians 11:24-28
““The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it? I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, Even to give every man according to his ways, According to the fruit of his doings.” Jeremiah 17:9-10
“But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.” Matthew 6:6
“Therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” I Peter 5:6-7
“All that the Father gives Me will come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out.” John 6:37
“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.” James 1:2-6
Remember when Jesus spoke about faith to His disciples. They asked Jesus to increase their faith, (9**) but the lesson there wasn’t to have more faith but to strengthen the faith they already had. In your current state, it may seem difficult or impossible to strengthen your faith when you’re holding onto so much doubt. Well, doubt does not come from God; it comes from the enemy. So why hold onto something that isn’t from God in the first place?
But how do you get rid of it?
Give it to God! It truly is that simple. But again, you may not feel a change overnight, and this may not be a one-time prayer. Just know that every time you give your doubts to God, you are making room for God to strengthen your faith. Just hang onto that mustard seed size of faith (10**) and that mountain of doubt that you’re carrying, God will lift it up off of you and chuck that sucker into oblivion! And with consistency over time, that doubt will be a thing of your past.
Again, this is a daily choice you have to make.
Scripture to support:
“And the apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.” So the Lord said, “If you have faith as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be pulled up by the roots and be planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you.” Luke 17:5-6
“Then the disciples came to Jesus privately and said, “Why could we not cast it out?” So Jesus said to them, “Because of your unbelief; for assuredly, I say to you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you. However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting.”” Matthew 17:19-21
Dear God,
Right now, I don’t really know if You’re there.
But if You are there, then I trust You see me and that You’re listening.
God, I’m coming to You in this moment as a far from perfect person, but I know You never asked for perfection.
I have so much doubt right now that it seems like my faith has disappeared. But I still want to praise You and say thank You.
God, only You are worthy of all the praise, glory, and power. You created the entire universe and all things seen and unseen. You are unmatched and undefeated and anyone who goes up against You has already lost.
Thank You for allowing me to go through this experience. Even though that feels weird to say, I’m trying my best to count it all joy. (8**) I don’t know why I have to go through this, but honestly, the why doesn’t matter. But please help me to understand what You want me to learn from this experience. Maybe I’ll be able to help someone else in the future.
God, I am so helpless without You! The weight of this doubt is crushing me! But I was silly to think I could hold onto it. So please, take this mountain of doubt on my shoulders. I give it to You because You’re the only One who can handle it. It wasn’t from You to begin with, and I don’t want anything that’s not from You.
I don’t know where my faith is right now, but please help me always to keep at least a mustard seed-sized amount. And with that, I will always trust in You. You said Your Word does not return to You void (Isaiah 55:11), so I trust in every Word You said because Your Word is alive.
God, please forgive me for my doubts and remind me that I am a child of the Living God! You are my Father, Jesus is my friend, and the Holy Spirit is my comforter. In this trial, help me to resist the devil so he will flee from me. (James 4:7) I come out of agreement with the enemy’s lies, and I am only in agreement with Your truth.
Father, I thank You again for trusting me with this trial, but if I’m going to make it through, I need You every step of the way. I love You because I know You love me.
Holy Spirit, please guide me through this and make me sensitive to Your presence so I can follow as You lead.
I pray this in the mighty name of Jesus, Amen.